Make a Good Wife

How many times have you questioned whether you'd make a good wife?

I have literally witnessed a young woman pray for a good, pure-hearted, Christian husband, and later overheard the same woman asking her boyfriend if he would use a toy on her...she didn't understand why they broke up!!

Understand this - NO ONE changes on their wedding day!!  That's not how wedding days work. Wearing a white dress won't make you pure. You cannot marry potential. We marry people, and God will not damn one in the blessing of the other.

A few months ago, my best friend’s family relocated. Visiting her new home for the first time, we got into a conversation about preparation. 

In recent years, I have purchased a home believed to be my dream home, where I am not always completely comfortable. I met a man who met nearly every item on my list of desirables, and we never even made it to our first date. 

When considering what it is that we want in a mate, we always think about the desirables, we never truly consider what we don’t want. Moreover, we never give consideration to what makes us (un)desirable. We consider what they bring to the table, but have no regard for what we offer...or lack.  How often do we truly evaluate ourselves? 

That young woman asked for all the things that she felt that she was supposed to ask for in the presence of "church folk", knowing full well that she was not ready to receive what she gave request of.  Judging from the fact that they broke up after her question, she also clearly lacked some understanding of the man that she was spending her time with.  This may seem like an extreme example, but a real one nonetheless.

We have got to start considering what our thoughts, desires and petitions to God could do to others. I was speaking to my daughter today about how unfair it is for someone to commit suicide by walking into traffic.  It is among the most selfish things that you can do, to take your own life and the future of a complete stranger.  Even if that person doesn't go to jail for killing you, they have to spend the rest of their lives tortured by your death. 

Along similar lines, what do you think happens to people who marry someone based on the person they thought they knew? 

When a woman considers a future with a man, whether she writes it down or not, she lists what she loves/hates, likes/dislikes about her mate to determine if she would say yes, should he ever ask her to marry him. Yet the bible says to examine yourself, not everyone else. 

Deuteronomy 4:9 (NKJV) says that you should, “only take heed to yourself, and diligently keep yourself, lest you forget the things your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. And teach them to your children and your grandchildren”.  How can you teach something to future generations that you don’t actually know? 

The entire premise of what is to be the Revealing Ruth movement is founded on wisdom and self-awareness before we can even get to love. The embodiment of this woman, at the center of the bible’s greatest love story, is knowledge of self and the actualization of purpose. 

The bible holds no record of Ruth ever questioning whether or not Mahlon or even Boaz would make a good husband. Instead, she focused on heeding the word of the Lord and wise counsel (Naomi) in ensuring that she was properly aligned in doing the Lord’s work. 

My friend says that I am in a season of preparation, and I welcome that with open arms, because the very last thing that I would ever want to do is to spend the rest of my life torturing the man whom God has sent forth to love and honor me, because I never considered my shortcomings as his wife.

In order to receive God's best, you have to be trying your best.

The Lord will not send you a Godly, upright Christian man, working in The Kingdom, walking in his purpose and wanting to love you as his own flesh, if your brokenness will:

     - Make you mean-spirited and distrustful 

     - Cause you to act out in perversion

     - Compromise his wholeness because you spend all of your time together making him pay for the mistakes of your past, or just 

     - Ruin what would've been the greatest blessing of your life because you were allowed to lay hold of it before you were ready

Each of us present in The Body of Christ have an assignment specific to us that no other soul has the wherewithal to carry out.  In order for God’s Plan to be successfully executed to our own greatness and His glory, we have to turn our gaze from without, to within. 

There is no way for you to know if a man is your husband except for God telling you that it is so, and the only way for you to actually hear God when He speaks, is to cleanse your senses with the living water of God’s Word.  2 Corinthians 13:5 (NIV), says “EXAMINE YOURSELVES to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves.” 

So the next time you're home alone going through lifes' shoulda, coulda, wouldas, or you're on a date and wondering if that guy would make a good husband, ask yourself this question instead

COULD I, WOULD I...MAKE A GOOD WIFE?

The inner healing work necessary to finding this questions' answer will be what dictates how long you wait for that soul mate you so desperately seek to find.

Follow Me as I Follow God

@RevealingRuth